You really coming over, don't trick.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Randomize