Texts From Last Night

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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?

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  (603): You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular? http://tfl.nu/marg
  Replies (7) Good night (2211) Bad night (486) Order T-Shirt
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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."

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  (250): He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that." http://tfl.nu/vmd9
  Replies (37) Good night (1279) Bad night (5347) Order T-Shirt
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  (218): View more from Minnesota

  Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house

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  (218): Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house http://tfl.nu/lsbu
  Replies (17) Good night (4830) Bad night (732) Order T-Shirt
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.

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  (610): The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed. http://tfl.nu/1baq
  Replies (21) Good night (4165) Bad night (732) Order T-Shirt
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  (512): View more from Texas

  Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?

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  (512): Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You? http://tfl.nu/i2et
  Replies (26) Good night (7269) Bad night (1197) Order T-Shirt
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  (705): View more from Ontario

  dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant

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  (705): dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant http://tfl.nu/i402
  Replies (25) Good night (1121) Bad night (10603) Order T-Shirt
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal

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  (240): today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal http://tfl.nu/c4vg
  Replies (21) Good night (7908) Bad night (907) Order T-Shirt
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.

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  (256): Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs. http://tfl.nu/y8sy
  Replies (23) Good night (2176) Bad night (4434) Order T-Shirt
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  (616): View more from Michigan

  Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.

  (616): View more from Michigan

  I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?

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  (616): Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past. (616): I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures? http://tfl.nu/o51k
  Replies (4) Good night (2781) Bad night (1233)
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  (206): View more from Washington

  Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.

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  (206): Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up. http://tfl.nu/qld8
  Replies (3) Good night (1556) Bad night (838) Order T-Shirt
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.

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  (910): I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair. http://tfl.nu/qnzd
  Replies (4) Good night (1491) Bad night (1065) Order T-Shirt
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  (936): View more from Texas

  You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.

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  (936): You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me. http://tfl.nu/du0t
  Replies (13) Good night (3640) Bad night (651) Order T-Shirt
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  (410): View more from Maryland

  That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.

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  (410): That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home. http://tfl.nu/bawg
  Replies (8) Good night (2404) Bad night (344) Order T-Shirt
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  (209): View more from California

  Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!

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  (209): Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology! http://tfl.nu/c0oh
  Replies (5) Good night (946) Bad night (184) Order T-Shirt
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  (510): View more from California

  Found an old burrito under my bed

  (415): View more from California

  You are a sick fuck

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  (510): Found an old burrito under my bed (415): You are a sick fuck http://tfl.nu/1myp
  Replies (5) Good night (339) Bad night (667)

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