Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize