I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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