Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize