Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
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