I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
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That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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