A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am naked and annoyed.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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