Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
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I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
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What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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