On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
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