can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
Randomize