i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
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I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
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I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
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