Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
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