i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Someone shattered a urinal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
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