Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
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