Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize