This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Randomize