I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
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