So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
I wish I only lived at night.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
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I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
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I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
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