Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
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