I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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