So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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