just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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