you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
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