girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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