At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize