i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize