Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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