ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
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