Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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