My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
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