It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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