My first STD was from a foam party
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
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