My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
its liver damage thursday
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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