I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Randomize