We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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