best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
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