I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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