her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
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