I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
We have started to decorate penises.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
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