So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
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