so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Randomize