i just google imaged poop.
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize