We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize