Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
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