Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize