It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Randomize