Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
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