God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
Even my vagina gasped.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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