I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize